This point

So I'm at this point, where I am once again feeling outside of everything.
At some juncture I'll note when during the month this happens, because I seriously think it's a hormonal thing.
But the thing is, that despite how lonely and depressed it makes me feel, it's an emotion, and emotions are just reactions. What I can make happen is not a result of how shitty my neurotransmitters make me feel, it is a direct consequence of my conscious decision to get up and make shit happen. I need to think of how to do this, but I will do it. Somehow.